My grandmother, though, a little different … She was found to have water in the brain and she’s been significantly declining. When my grandfather passed, she really started going downhill really fast. He seemed to be her anchor, and he, you know took care of her every day, but that was even a struggle for him.
We didn’t know how much of a struggle until my parents and I lived with her shortly after he passed to take care of her because she couldn’t live on her own. Some days she was better than others, and some days she couldn’t get out of bed. There were bouts of anger, which is a common part of having Alzheimer’s, and not being the same person anymore. She’s still alive, she now lives in a home, but it’s not my grandmother anymore. She’s someone who’s very, very confused, and she has to relive my grandfather’s death every day because she doesn’t remember that he’s passed. Now we have a rule with my family that if she asks, we don’t tell her that he’s dead so she doesn’t have to go through that over and over again.